Friday, November 28, 2008

Turkey Hunger

For the first time in my life, I dove into the feeding frenzy that is "Black Friday". Oh my my. I began my excursion with my sister, and proceeded as an observer of a social experiment. How many people really come out to these? Are they normal? Before long, I was no longer scientist but lab rat. You go to toy aisle 5 and I'll grab your game...break!

I really wanted a tighter budget for Christmas this year and the sales really helped lengthen the stride of my dollar. We hit our first store at 4:15 am! I am almost embarassed of that last sentence.

Scenario one 4:45 am: Little Big-Sis is in line to buy 12 pairs of jeans at JCPenney. Ahead of her is Dominatrix. Ahead of Dominatrix is a woman holding her place in line for her daughter/sister/friend/whatever. So when DSFW comes into the line, Dominatrix drops the dreaded F-Bomb and tells her not to butt in.

What do you do? Well, if you are all generally sweet Idahoans (which is where the scene of this crime was) you audibly gasp and then avoid eye contact with Dominatrix. Sheesh! Merry Christmas!

Scenario two 5:10am: Throng of Idahoans at Wal-Mart. Since it's a 24 hour place there's no long lines in the parking lot. Everyone is inside and it's like a Def Leppard concert in the 80's, people jammed together with mulletts everywhere. The employees bring the big doorbusters out, covered up with butcher paper and then they rrrriiip! off the paper and behold the feast of consumer goods. TEN MEGAPIXEL DIGITAL CAMERA FOR $69.99!!!

People are grabbing and shouting "I got one!". Soon employees gingerly start chucking cameras into the crowd. Little Big-Sis has her hands up hoping to make a winning catch. A camera arcs up, out, and skids past the fingertips of...the lady in front of her. Lands straight into sissy's hands and unleashes the anger of the fumbler "Hey, he was throwing that to me!".

What do you do? Well if you are Mrs. Olsen's smart, economical, and number-crunching sister, you do the shoulder shrug with a smile, and say "He was just tossing it into the crowd, sorry". Fumbler huffs and puffs out of there, ticked at my Little Big-Sis.

So there were a few Doorbuster Items that were sold out in the first five minutes. I didn't get everything on my list. I really wanted to BE DONE in the North Pole Department, so when I got home I hit ebay. I found some auctions closing later in the day, and made some small-time offers on them.

Guess what? BLACK FRIDAY is a fabulous day to eBay! Everyone is out shopping! I won some auctions and got some great deals. Wahoo!

NOTE TO SELF AND YOU: Ebay stops being annoying on Black Friday.

Over and out!
Mrs. Olsen


the merriest said...

ebay...brilliant idea!!

Monica said...

I love that we survived Black Friday and were semi-successful. We rock! Thanks for hanging out with us this week--it was fun having you at our house!

Bryan Cogman said...

Ha ha! You're a very good writer, Amber. I discovered your blog today and am enjoying it very much.

See you soon!


Mrs. Olsen said...

Bryan, Thanks for coming out to play. Monica, thanks for the pre-dawn adventure.

Anonymous said...

Mrs.Olsen- thank you for your comment on my new blog. It's a blog I was certain no one would comment on but I just feel there is so much hope to share. Wish I knew how one should spread the word.

Love you.
P.S. if there were a writers tug of war you'd kick everyone's trash!

Jenny said...

I love the account! I started joining in on Black Friday a couple of years ago with my aunts. What a hoot! It's absolutely hilarious. The first year they were calling me and each other "I FOUND VACUUMS FOR $10! I GOT YOU ONE! DO YOU WANT ONE!?" I've actually used that vacuum a lot... I go with a cash budget and usually only get a few things but just the experience is hilarious- and you really do save a lot of money.