Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts

Friday, June 18, 2010

Why I Fight

Because I've already made it to the ten year mark in my marriage, and I want another ten (or fifty): I'm a fighter.


Because my kids will eventually grow up and have an email account, and will possibly get solicited by perves inviting them to get enlarged: I'm a fighter.
*gosh I hope that never happens





Because sex is a beautiful symbol of marital unity: I'm a fighter.




Because I was a business owner for 6 years, and think employees should be paid for job skillz and not addictions: I'm a fighter.



Because I think women should be admired for their brains, and not their boobs: I'm a fighter.

My sweet Grandma Cooper, who passed away this year.

If you agree on at least one of these counts, then I invite you to become a fighter too!





How can you help? I mean really help?

Join the facebook group "Help FIGHT THE NEW DRUG Win 100,000 Dollars" and then vote for them every day. Don't worry, they'll send an email reminder with a link, which let's be honest, can get pretty annoying.

But has there ever been an easier way to fight?

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Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Week of Love: Va Va Va VooooOOOM

What good is a Valentines Week of Love without some talk about love-making right? This won't be out of hand, I promise. But first, a story about my sweet and GIANT (and by giant I mean 6feet1inch) little sister, Niki.





So in case you're new here, Mrs. Olsen plus her family are Mormons. That means your goal is to marry in the temple, which is a clean and holy place. And a peaceful place too. To marry there, you have to meet several faithful requirements, one of which is to not be a fornicator. God does love a virtuous woman, this I know. Which means that sex is a wonderful and scary mystery to the average virginal Mormon girl getting married for the first time.

For most people who think that lives on TV are standard, this (being a virginal Mormon girl) is NOT normal.

So my little giant sister Niki, bless her little heart, has left her western landscape where Mormon Culture was prevalent, and is now standing out amongst the heathens of the East. *wink*

Which means that Niki, who already stands out like a sore thumb because of her freakish height, is now standing out because she is young, a wife, and has more than 2 kids (East Coast Standard). Her hubs is in a medical residency, and is just about the ONLY guy that is NOT single, and definitely the only one that has kids.

A fellow resident recently gets married, and Niki and her husband arrive at a get-together to meet and greet the doctor and his new wife. When the new bride meets Niki, who is funny and friendly (and honest...bless her little heart), they start talking about how the wedding was. This led to talk of the new bride's amazing and extravagant honeymoon all through Europe.

So get this, this is my brave sister honestly confronting these rare missionary opportunities denied her in the west:

"Yeah, our honeymoon wasn't that awesome. We were supposed to go to a cabin but that didn't work out, so we just drove to Boise, Idaho. But we are Mormons ya know? So we hadn't had sex before we got married so it didn't really matter where we went cause we hardly left the hotel anyway. (Laugh)"

Pause.

Silence.

Upper-Crust East Coaster says NOTHING, looks at my sister like she's a freak and walks away.

Can I just say that she is putting herself out there and is ready to answer your questions about her religion! I LOVE HER. Boise, Idaho? For real? And since I'm injecting myself into this conversation, here's Mrs. Olsen giving upper-cruster a beeeech-slap for not having a sense of humor...or respect.

Well, my sister is right. You get married and hardly leave the hotel room during your honeymoon and you figure things out without the stupid Sex in the City girlfriends sharing tips and one-upping each other in the bedroom. You are alone, you and your spouse, and you learn to:

*share bank accounts
*plan meals
*go to church together
*share dreams
*work jobs to achieve dreams
*go to school without your folks paying rent anymore
*learn love languages
*pray together
*stop taking road trips cause you have bills to pay
*get a purpose
*support
*sacrifice
*serve

and when you aren't UNITED in the above department, how is it you can UNITE physically without a sort of spiritual schizophrenia?

SEX is the ultimate symbol of a united life in the financial, health, religious, parenting, retirement planning, working, building a home, and loving a family department.

I don't say this to ostracize those that live differently from me and my weird little sister. People are still beautiful, even if fornicators. And little sisters far from home, raising 3 kids and supporting a husband who works 90+ hours a week, going to parties and telling it like it is...will ALWAYS be beautiful to me.

With Love,
Mrs. Olsen

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Monday, December 1, 2008

Mrs. Olsen Talks Sex

Dad, if you're reading this, I have not turned a new-leaf from loving mother to online distributor of porn. Promise. Mainly, I wanted to highlight a couple of new blogs that are unique in their offerings and have one thing in common: sex.

Okay, so first! There is a new ad campaign and one of the Olsen Spawn is a founder. This is not the reason I am highlighting it however. Here's a blip and you guess what it's about. It'll be fun.


Fighter? I'm a lover not a fighter. Fighter of what?



Okay, I'll be a fighter.

Fight the New Drug is the up and coming ad campaign to educate families, perverts, and unfulfilled husbands on the dangers and addictions of pornography.

I am excited for this simply because I have two boys who eventually will hit puberty and get an email account with unsolicited naughty invitations (one can only have a hotmail account so long before getting on the perves mass mailing list).

Which brings me to the next blog you should become a fan of. Be One: Strengthening Marriage Through Sexual Intimacy is self-explanatory in its mission, to use sex to strengthen the marriage. The blog author is an old friend from years back, whose personal insight and sense of service literally leaves throngs of people in her wake hoping to get a free therapy session. She has a gift. Here's an excerpt from the blog, so you know where she's coming from:

Many of you may wonder how and why this subject has struck enough interest in me to start a blog. I mentioned before that this interest is a gift. I believe that. There are so few people out there with respectful knowledge about this topic- especially women- especially, especially LDS women. Where does one turn to learn and grow in knowledge? What if there are days of frustration and stress because of this subject? What if your marriage is suffering or it's causing hidden emotions, or you dislike intimacy all together? What if your situation is good but not GREAT? Where do you seek help? Is it ok to learn more? My interest is for everyone. -BLOG: "Be One" November 30, 2008 post


Husbands to Good-Christian-Women everywhere just found a new best friend.

To follow these or other blogs (Mrs. *cough*sen's blog) then simply log in to your blogger account, and find your dashboard and customize your reading list.

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